Premarital sex and the human tendency to interfere in everyone's personal affairs

This post was inspired by a contest on indiblogger.com

My personal opinion on premarital sex is that it really isn't that important a subject. Its everybody's choice. As far as I'm concerned, as long as I love him or her and/or do it willingly, it doesn't really matter. Its a personal choice. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But, most people refuse to acknowledge the fact that somebody doesn't agree with your beliefs.

They use slurs and terms such as 'immoral','indecent' and quite a few others that I'd rather not mention. If someone needs a person to warm their bed without the ring or the mangalsutra , its their choice. Why does society have to make it a point to force its own religious and moral ideals onto every single person ? 

Women are expected to be virgins till the marriage night. But, does the same rule apply to men? Never have I heard of a man being criticised for his premarital sexual encounters. But with women, its commonplace. Theyre trollops. Western ideology has affected them too much. "Her parents shouldn't have let her watch TV. Or go to work in that office. Wearing pants and skirts. The uncultured, uncouth, whore. We have to warn our boys against her."

Coming back to the point, there's nothing wrong with having a bit of fun without the burden of being married. I read an article the other day about a woman who waited till marriage and later figured out that she didn't even enjoy the act but did it because she'd promised to. What sense does that make?

Marriage is not a prerequisite to explore our own as well as other people's bodies. Some people say that if you've had premarital sex , there's a greater chance of extra marital affairs. Utterly stupid, I say. After having so many or even one or two other people, the person has chosen to stick with and marry their current partner. Out of everyone else. Premarital sex is in no way a contributing factor to extramarital affairs.

Sex is a way to feel closer to your partner. Physical intimacy is just as important as emotional. People have to be compatible in both ways for the relationship to work out.  It helps you get closer and more comfortable to your partner. One night stands are a great way to feel good. You have a splendid time with someone new and some people actually end up dating or at least being friends with their one night stands.

 If its fun,consensual, and it feels great, what's the big fucking deal ?

Thanks for bearing with me till the end of this post.
PS check out this book pretty please ?

Why?

 I don't like people that lie. I might lie my ass off . but I don't lie to make myself look better or put others down. Many people that lie , don't do that. Your reasons count too. Its not what you do, its why you do it.I care about the reason more than I do about the act. Sometimes bad things are done for a good cause. Sometimes good things are done for a wrong cause. White lies are considered bad. But with most girls , especially ones with insecurities , if your reply to do I look fat or do I look ugly, isnt either you're beautiful to me no matter what or no, its not only hurting her self esteem but also your body .

Okay better example. You get raped. You manage to kill the guy. Murder is bad; But is it not justified somewhat in this case ? There are various laws regarding this. Everyone has the right to injure or kill their rapist without repercussions.But it has to be proven that they did indeed rape you or try to. Murder is still wrong. However justified it may be. Homicide is still wrong. Doesn't matter if they deserve it. Doesn't matter if its self preservation. Aren't you just channelling the wrong they did to you by directing a wrong against them.?Killing someone ,including yourself is supposedly wrong according to public opinion. Even if it is for self preservation. You won't be judged for it. You won't be jailed for it. If you can prove you did it in as an act of self preservation, you'll have no repercussions. But , you have killed someone. Whether or not there are any repercussions. Murder is considered wrong. But , it is justified in some cases. That's where the statement comes in. Sometimes , something wrong (murder) is done for a good reason(self preservation). Reasons do matter. You may not face legal repercussions but over time you will face mental ones. You will have a guilty conscience. No matter why you did it. And it'll take years or months of therapy and other help for you to completely move on and learn that tour reasons were important and not what you did. That's the thing. Reasons matter. The conscience needs to be eased.

Everything has a reason. Even the most spontaneous of acts have a reason. You might not know the reason, but there always is one.For any sort of change to occur there has to be some stimulus. Some driving force. something that makes it possible. you wore red boxers.Is there a reason? Possibly. You also had a pair of blue boxers. But you chose red over blue. Maybe it caught your eye. Maybe it was clean and the blue was dirty. It could be anything. But there is always a reason. It may be unkown. It is hard to establish a cause effect relationship but everything has a cause. Whatever it may be. Maybe there's a being from the fifth dimension, controlling your choices, nudging you towards the right direction. Who knows ? "Wear red boxers, they ignore you if you wear red." There may or may not be. You'd never know. Cause is very hard to determine.But if an effect is sufficiently complex, the relationship can be determined more easily. Murder , for example is complex. A red pair of boxers over a blue pair is simpler in nature. What's the reason for that? Therefore one would find it hard to establish such a relationship. Murder involves a ton of psychological as well as biological processes. The release of certain hormones to give you the extra push. The motivation behind the act. Memories. Learning. Everything combines. But when it comes to randomly picking up a pair of boxers , actions are mostly Mechanical. They're on a subconscious level. You don't know why. You just pick it at 'random' Nothing is ever truly 'random'. However, this is not entirely true in quite a few cases.

 Attention is not as simple a process as you may think. There's observation of stimuli then its attention . then you focus.and then its perception where your mental and psychological forces are at play. Memories . learning. Emotions etcetera work together and produce a reaction. Perhaps it was Your laziness that produced the reaction which was to grab the nearest pair.But yeah, as I was saying. There is always a reason. Either conscious or on the subconscious level. For every human action. That's why psychologist work so hard. Unless you establish a cause and effect relationship you can never truly 'cure' something.You can tone it down , yes. You can control it a bit .but you cannot cure something completely until you know exactly what caused it. Psychologists study the reasons for certain human behavioural tendencies. Chemistry majors study the causes of certain reactions. What was needed to make this chemical behave in this way. The entire universe is based on a cause and effect relationship. The biggest question is always , why do we exist. Why do we exist? There has to be a cause for the effect that is our existence. There has to be a cause for the effects of the big bang. There always has to be a cause. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction We know the reaction. What was the action ? What caused god ? God himself is an effect. There has to be some sort of superior being that caused the existence of this one. So on and so forth. There's always a cause for everything. And we , as humans, with our curiosity spend our entire lives searching for causes of various effects. We study. We conduct experiments and research. We advance in our technology.

We do it all to find a cause.

Marijuana on my mind

Contrary to public opinion,

This world isn't just black and white.

Where's a rainbow when you need it?

Flowers are plastic;

Hearts are ice;

Veins, full of drugs;

Come on now , choose your vice.

They'll hate you if you do;

They'll hate you if you don't.

So, what's the point in staying away?

Come on light up that blunt.

You and I

I put my pen to paper,
As I try to calm my heart.
The tears, they blur out most of the words,
And so, once again, I have to start.

The tingling in my arms won't stop.
I clutch the pen as tightly as I can.
Staying away from the blade.
It's not that easy, after all.

I Think of that smile like a beacon of hope
Driving out the darkness in the blink of an eye
That's all that keeps me going anymore
The thought that we'll be together, forever, You and I. 

Someday...

Someday, I'll find my prince.
Someday, I'll make my mark.
Someday, I'll show 'em what I really am all about.

Someday, the pain will end.
Someday, the tears will dry.
Someday, the blood won't drip, anymore.

Someday, I'll prove myself.
Someday, I'll show the world.
Someday, they'll finally understand.

Someday, why's it so far away?
Someday, I've been waiting so long.
Someday, my heart can't take this anymore

Why can't my Someday begin today? 

Letters to My Lover. (7)

I wanted to start by apologising for everything I put you through. I'm mean. I'm bitchy. I'm easily offended and way too emotional. I'm possessive and jealous and I'm so goddamn rude. I name call and fight for no reason and I could just go on and on but I don't have the strength to point out any more. You know them all. Yet, you simply bear them silently. And I don't think I could ever thank you enough for that. You're different from the kind of people I've known. You're sweet and kind and patient and so tolerant. I'm sorry for everything. I swear I'll try harder. I'll do my best to deserve even an iota of your love.
When I'm with you though, in person, it's different. All I can think of is the way your skin glistens with sweat when you come over, on hot afternoons. The way your hair is messy and yet looks perfect. The way you smile with those perfect pearly whites shining bright. It's not just the devilish grin with the widening of your mouth but you smile with your entire face. It's clear that you're happy. I hope I'm right in my 'deduction'. Your face just lights up like a beacon of light, leading the ship that is my heart, to the shore that is yours. It's infectious. You're infectious. I don't know whether you're a drug or a disease or some weird combination of both. Because, I'm addicted to you and no amount of rehab (that is, anything people say to get me away from you) will stop my cravings. A disease because, well, you infect me with your love. When you smile, my chest almost bursts open, for my heart beats so fast. When your skin grazes mine, it sets me on fire. I get goose pimples and my skin begins to tingle and it just, it feels so good. I can't explain it properly since I'm not yet capable of using words that well. I feel the closest to you not when we're naked, not when we're inside each other. In a way, one. But when we're simply sitting next to each other. Doing nothing in particular. When I sometimes catch you looking at me, and when you sometimes catch me. When our limbs bump into each other's. When I look into your beautiful eyes. That's when I feel the most secure. The closest to you. It brings me joy beyond compare.
I've given you all of me, and I believe you when you say that you've given me all of you. There's nothing more that I could ask of you. You're perfect. And you're mine. And having you with me, makes me feel a bit perfect as well. Without you I'm just an insecure Mess but with you, it all makes sense. We make sense. Because we're perfect together. And we'll show the world exactly what we can do. Exactly how amazing we are. We'll make everyone see us the way we see each other. I'll always be there for you, in moments black or blue. I'll be by your side, any time of day or night. Just give me your word that you won't ever give up on us. I give you mine. That's all I want from you. I love you. My heart is yours to keep for evermore. You can do whatever you want with it. But I'm begging you never to break it. It's barely back together. It won't heal in time if anything happens to it.

All Because of You.

There's all these voices resonating in my ears,
Yet I sit here all alone, shedding tears.
The walls are closing in on me
I'm feeling like I'm suffocating

I'm searching for a way out
Of this mess I've made.
I'm looking all around,
For a familiar face.

That's when I see your smile that lights up,
The darkness in the corners of my soul.
I feel alive,
I feel like I'm brand new.

All because of you
I fought the fight
I won the war
I crossed the finish line.

All because of you
I've made it out perfectly fine
All those dark thoughts
Have now left my mind.

All Because of You...